July 19, 2008

July 2008

Our twin babies were born a bit too prematurely - in the 26th week of pregnancy - i.e. in the sixth month, 22nd May 2008. The second day after the delivery at night I could not sleep and a horrible fear that something was wrong with the babies attacked me. Even though I was told by the nurses from the AR unit that everything was all right this fear would not leave me. I had to meditate the whole night till the morning, untill the fear left me.
The first thing in the morning I learnt that half an hour after I had spoken to the nurses the doctors found out that Michael - the baby boy from the twins - had bled into the lungs and his state was very critical at night. In the morning it was better, but the day after they found out that he had bled into both brain chambers and that this hemmorrage was a VERY severe one. The doctors´ suggestion was TERMINATE his life! In other words - to take out the ventilator tube that was keeping him alive and breathing... They were saying that our son would be so severely disabled for life that there was very high probability he could be just vegetating and would have to be fed by a gastric tube for his whole life, not being able to move nor eat by himself, that there was no sense in keeping him alive. And even if they would not terminate his life on purpose, there was still high probability for him to die anyway, they simply felt there was no sense in continuation of the medical care. I had to persuade the doctors I wanted him to live and to look after him no matter what, so that they would continue in looking after our tiny son. When I informed them that I was willing and ready to care for Michael even if the worst scenario would come true, they decided to care also. But the neonatologists told me that except for the damaged brain and lungs there was a problem with Misha´s peristalsis - it did not seem to work, it seemed that the nerves controling it were damaged. If this situation would not change, Misha would be facing certain death even being on the machines. I was sending all the healing energy I could into his tiny body untill the peristalsis started to work. There was nothing the doctors could have done in this, it was a different, universal power in act. Another thing was his kidneys. After the problem with the peristalsis was solved, Misha´s kidneys started to fail. He would not pee - a big problem. Even bigger for a baby with damaged lungs by the hemmorrage. The water that was retained in his little body was causing his chest to be heavier and heavier - it meant a double danger for him - one - the blood started to be more and more poluted, two - he had even bigger problems with breathing then before and the ventilator had to be on a more razing regime. His lungs had to be filled with the air from the ventilator under a higher pressure, which meant the lungs were being damaged even more. The same scenario happened - an energy from me flowing - and Misha started to pee and eventually he got rid of all the redundant water. The doctors were using drugs called diuretics to help him to pee, but at first he did not react to them at all. After the universal power intervened - things changed. I am greatful for the development of the medical science and mainly for the neonatologists - all the equipment is soo tiny and and sophisticated! But not even the best neonatologist is able to help a baby to stop a developing hydrocephalus. Since the hemmorrage to the brain was a massive one, and to both brain chambers, the blood that stayed there after this was irritating the brain, which caused a redundant liquid to be produced. It seemed that the coagulated blood also blocked the way out from the brain for this liquid to go. Michael´s brain started to grow, was bigger and bigger and it was clear that if things would not change, he would need an operation of the brain - to make a way out for this redundant liquid. Problem was - the state of his lungs did not allow this ...I know it might sound I am repeating myself by now :-), but after I transfered healing energy into him... There is no hydrocephalus now when it comes to Misha - the way for the liquid to get out of his brain was formed and as well the irritation was stopped since the intracranial preassure is balanced now... NO OPERATION NEEDED!!!!
And there is more - eight weeks after the bleeding to lungs and brain happened - which was supposed to disable Michael both physically and intelectually for life, making him possibly nothing more than a vegetable - Michael is moving his hands and legs, he is able to hold an object already in his little palm, using the fingers precisely as a healthy baby would. He can hear. He can very probably even see. He simply looks just like Gabi does. I do believe he and his little sister will continue in growing big and strong and that they will not die, but will live. By the way - Misha does not need the ventilator now, the only thing he is connected to now is CPAP.
The whole time when I was going through this agony, I was focusing on the universal energy that can intervene even in the physical world and meditating and receiving it, so that I could be transfering this energy into my twin´s tiny bodies.
Shortly after the bleeding Michael was lying in the incubator like a little corps and he would not move. The doctors kept him under sedatives so that he would not feel pain - if possible. Tears were running down my cheeks, I was not able to stop them, I would not sob, just flood from my eyes was running and I would not even wipe them off. I was holding his - so tiny, so small, so little, not moving hand and knew just one thing for sure - that I had to connect myself with something above and visualize him healthy before I would see it by my own eyes. It seemed - in the natural - that Michael would look like this - helpless, not moving, not breathing by his own - for his whole life. Still I felt I had to accertain myself of the fact that I WAS able to see that he is healed


I would like to say heartfelt thank you to the team of the doctors and nurses of the Neonatology Gynekologicko - porodnické kliniky 1. lékařské fakulty UK a VFN in Prague at "Apolinář" for their, not only professional, but also human care which they have been and still are giving to our babies. Mainly to doctors Kopecky, Pazderova, and Dokoupilova. Thank you.

19. July - Misha in the bath - video

July 18, 2008

Meaning of our babies´ names

Today I have just found out what do the names of our babies mean.
Michael - who is like God
Gabriela - might of God
I must say nothing describes better our babies story...